adb: Computers are bunk. You should suggest to an alternative data-base
system: 1) data is written on bananas 2) bananas are hung in a tree 3) monkeys are trained to fetch bananas 4) monkey eats banana and drops the peel with desired data onto the person requesting data below. It’s fool-proof.
ghort: unfortunately such systems provide very high parallel read performance but write performance is very slow. i think i would need to implement some kind of giraffe-based caching system to upload the bananas faster
adb: While the giraffe system is a definite improvement, their necks would undoubtedly be a bottleneck to data write throughput. After 1000 writes from the banana heap to tree-disk a giraffe would have to be replaced. Perhaps an army of squirrels? Their reproduction rate would alleviate the problems of wear and tear of data-running.
ghort: agreed; squirrel caching is much more advanced. i might be concerned about incompatibility between the squirrels & monkeys, but perhaps we could implement some kind of hardware-layer gorilla to insure transactional coherence. also, there’s going to be shit everywhere
adb: compost heap, we can grow them bananas right